Monday, September 21, 2009

It's Monday again?

Here we are - another weekend over. Sheesh. Where does the time go?

People send me sooo many email jokes. Usually, I just delete them, but lately I have been reading some, this was cute so I thought I would share...I think some are actually from that comedian Steven Wright..I use to love watching him. I will have to poke around and see if I can find some of his stuff.


"The 9 Things I Hate About Everyone"

1.People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.
I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours?
Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2.People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V.
remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3. When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too.'
Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is.
Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it?
Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5.When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'
No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6.People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'
Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7.When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it?
If it's new, then there has never been anything before it.
If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8.When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?
Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9.When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'
Ummmm, If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

And here is a funny picture that I found as well. Heehee...



Happy Monday everyone! Hope everyone has a great week!

2 comments:

Ms Bitchtits to You said...

Hahaha; great stuff. Happy Monday!

September 21, 2009 2:38 PM
Sexy at Forty said...

Ms Bitchtits - Thanks!

September 21, 2009 6:45 PM

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